Inheritance, Priceless!

Mom, Dad, and Melinda, my sister XO

I've been away from my blog for a few months. Sincere apologies for the hiatus, and thanks for your patience and understanding XO. The reason for the gap is that my beloved sister passed in September of last year, and my mother passed in May of this year. Both had been struggling for quite a while and for that time I tried to love each as best I could through their challenges. Their deaths were a double whammy that took quite a bit of processing, some good therapy, and lots of love from friends and family to get to a place of peace, nevermind feeling joy and laughter and letting go of so very very much. 

But I've found that the Universe and my angels work in the most beeeautiful ways, so I'm going to share that with you so you can experience some of it with your Lovies in their Heavens, or create some love of your own to leave behind when it's your turn. I doubt you'll need tissues for this post unless it's to wipe away tears of laughter. Settle in for an excellent story, one of the best ever. Make some tea, or have a glass of wine, it's ever so long but well worth the read indeed.

Mom was 90 and 1/2 when she passed, and she suffered terribly for quite a while, though she kept her mind as sharp as she could, and she kept her sense of humor as much as she could for as long as she could. So when I had to go over to the lovely condo she'd lived in for the past 12 or 15 years to choose what I wanted to bring home with me I didn't think I could do it. I was pretty sure I'd just fall apart. 

You know how we "air-talk" with our Lovies in Heaven? Well I air-talked with all my girls, my Mom, my sis, and my daughter, and I said, "I need your help with this. I need you to lend me all your love and serenity and peace and bring me strength to keep my wits about me because this is way too hard." And this is what happened. I swear it was as if my Mom was right there next to me guiding me and my sis was right there with her. Jess was doing the music.

My sweet hubby and I got into the car after I'd procrastinated long enough, and as soon as we sat down a song came on (we know the spirits/angels use music to communicate with us), and it was Bette Midler's song that I call "God is watching us," but the actual title is "From a Distance." Even now it gives me those lovely good goosebumps that let me know I'm receiving spiritual confirmation - here is her beautiful song - From a Distance

This was so comforting because there's something highly uncomfortable about going to your Mom's home, knowing she's not there, and knowing it will be sold, and all that she loved and surrounded herself with, all those years of memories and experiences would be part of the past. Owie! So I let the music comfort me and enjoyed the beauty of the trees and homes and people living in my sweet little town all the way there, traveling that familiar route that would never again feel the same.

Of course we had a key, so we let ourselves in, and I said, air-talking again, "Hi Sweet Mom." And yep, I cried when we stepped through the front door. I told myself crying was okay, healthy, even, and mopped with tissues, which graduated to paper towels, as I stood a bit frozen, looking around. The whole place was all jumbled up since the family member who'd been designated Executor had been working to organize and clear things out. So that was unsettling as her home was no longer as she had arranged it. 

I turned to the first room, the front bedroom, which had been a "spare room" with a pull-out couch and other lovely furniture, most of which was gone (in storage for other family members, all good). I just stood there looking at the humongous pile of books left on the couch because one thing Mom did as long as she could was read. She read and read and read after she lost mobility of her body, and she LOVED a good story. So many, many of our phone calls were joyous times where she would tell me stories about her life, her loves (only one man, and that's my Dad, who's also in Heaven with her, but she loved a lot of other things and people too), and her adventures. WOW she had a very exciting, challenging life, since Dad was a civil engineer with Exxon and from the beginning of their marriage they traveled all over the globe where he spearheaded lots of different projects which are to this day making huge, positive differences in the lives of the communities he worked in. I am proud to be his daughter.

I did something I had NEVER done, because this was Mom's private abode, and these were her things. I went through the drawers of a bureau that was still there (will be auctioned along with a few other things, and yep, that feels weird, but I prayed that every single thing that ends up in auction goes with blessings for those who re-home these treasures so they feel joy and love and enjoy giving them new life and appreciation). 

I had made a list of things I wanted to look for, and I had talked out loud with my husband about them on the porch as we do a lot of talking on the porch, always have and always will. One of my happy places for sure. So I had this little list - a photo of my grandmother and grandfather, a particular photo of my sister all dressed in evening finery and playing the piano at a formal event we had attended, and Rob and I had talked of other things, such as, "How old was the oldest member of your family?" Mine was 102, and that was my Dad's grandmother Ellen who loved art and pottery and creativity and I still have a lovely "cabbage bowl" she painted and glazed, which I served home-made Thousand Island salad dressing in one year for one of our many family barbecues. 

Great Grandmother Ellen's beautiful creation!

All nicely glazed inside too!

Isn't she just beautiful?! Great Grandmother Ellen XO

My Great Grandmother was amazing. She never remarried after her husband was killed in the war. They'd only been married three years and she loved him and stayed loyal to him for the rest of her life. Raised her son on her own. She lived in a one-room cabin with no running water and no electricity for most of her life. Had an outhouse and chamber pot. And she'd cook a chicken for supper and store it in her oven (with the heat off) for three days, snacking on the leftovers with no worries whatsoever. Wonder if she knew something we don't...I know she knew how to be fierce and gentle at the same time.

We also talked about when we lived in Japan and my parents bought my sister and me the full-on Japanese traditional wear, including the kimono, all the accessories to go with it, including the shoes (called zories), and the "socks" made especially for wearing with zories since these shoes are made like verrrry fancy flip-flops with the toe thing so that the "socks" have that shape for your foot, space for the big toe and all the other toes go into the other side, and they have the most beautiful brass fasteners that slip into embroidered stitches to hold them on. They're made of silk. Very fancy. I came across the "socks" but the kimonos and all that good stuff were gone. My sis and I were 6 and 4 years old when my parents dressed us like that, which I'm sure they did for special occasions only. We were occasionally allowed to put those things on later when we were in the U.S. but not really allowed to "play" with them. I liked that it showed my mother's embrace of all the various cultures we found ourselves immersed in during our travels. And there were a few other things on my list that were special.

So I was in that room looking through those drawers and what was the very first thing my hand was guided to? An old gold 9 x 12 envelope, which, when I opened it, held THAT photo of my grandparents! And what was the second thing I encountered? Loose in the drawer just floating around, OMG! A snipped out newspaper article about my Great Grandmother Ellen - oldest resident at nursing home dies at age 102! WHAT?! Yep. They were all with me, right there - my angels. So I put those special things aside to bring home.

It's THAT photo that I wanted of my Gammy and Grandaddy and TA DA!
There it was right at my fingertips in the most unlikely drawer!

Oh also I came across a love note from my father to my mother when she was heading into yet another challenge, in which he said, "darling, with all my heart, mind, soul, and body, I love you." Oh my heart! I carried it around with me for several days and now it's in one of my treasure boxes. Sigh....

I love how he not just underlined but added little circles,
which I often do in my journals, didn't know he did it too!

Ah such sweet love, "with all of my heart, mind, soul, and body, I love you." Now that's some lovely encouragement for what she was going through at the time, which I don't know any details of.

So here comes the magic. Someone who's 90 or even 80 and struggling with physical challenges isn't always the sunshine kid on the block, understandably. But there was a time when my Mom was truly happy, and more creative than I knew. I came across a letter she wrote to her parents, and out of all the correspondence in that place that was put into garbage bags, THIS letter was among some papers that had not been trashed. And it is AMAZING. It's Mom and Melinda, both of my lovely recently passed angels in their glories, and reading it, I felt Mom was showing me what she made of her life before her hardships, and that's the key phrase. What SHE made of it.

Incidentally, Mom always apologized to my sister about her birthplace, which was Elizabeth, New Jersey, because her other two kids were born exotically overseas, my brother in Malaysia, and me in Rotterdam, Holland (now called the Netherlands). Mom and Dad had various periods of time in the U.S. between overseas trips over the years. Get a load of the old Western Union telegram they sent to let Mom's parents know about my brother's birth!

Yep, no phones that far away, no internet,
no reliable communication but Western Union was there!

I will upload photos of her letter about my sister so you can see the beautiful cursive handwriting we were all taught. And my mother and father and grandparents were taught so precisely you can hardly tell their handwriting apart. (I learned to write cursive in England when we lived there for two years so I was taught differently and my handwriting doesn't look like theirs, much to the frustration of my teachers here who tried to correct it but their efforts didn't take, HA!) But I'll also retype it for those who might find it hard to read. This letter is HILARIOUS because my mother wrote the whole thing from my sister's point of view, as if my baby sister were writing it. Such imagination! It's Mom's storytelling talents shining brilliantly! Here we go:

Mom wrote on the front "From Melinda" and herein lies the magic.
Notice the 3 cent stamp? HA!

Page 1. You can click on the image to enlarge it.
Isn't her handwriting so pretty?!

And here is what it says:

Saturday afternoon - Feb 1

Dear Gammie and Grand-daddy,

I just woke up from my nap. Daddy is spray-painting the trunks in the living room, and the paint smells so bad that Mommie and I came in here in the bedroom and shut the door. I told Mommie to bring pen and ink so I could dictate this to her while we have plenty of time.

Guess what I surprised Mommie and Daddy with this morning? My first toophy!!! 'Course I knew all the time it was coming in, but I tried to be so good and I didn't fuss one time this whole week. Mommie discovered it when she was feeding me my breakfast - she kept hitting it with the spoon. Finally she stuck her finger in my mouth and next thing I knew she was yelling at the top of her lungs for Daddy. He jumped out of bed and came running fast as he could! Well, I never saw such excitement in my life. I didn't...

Page 2

know my toophy was so important but it must be, cause all the neighbors have come to admire it! (Aunt Edna, Martha, and Aunt Pat.) I'm beginning to feel right proud, too, and I try to grin as often as I can so everyone can see my big accomplishment.

If you wonder what's wrong with Mommie's writing, it's my fault. I keep trying to see for myself if she's writing what I tell her to. They're both sitting on the bed, and I crawl over to her at least ten times a minute - just checking!

I can get about real good now. I don't crawl the usual way. I drag my tummy along and use my right foot to push - if you see what I mean. It sure gets me where I want to go! How I love to explore down on the floor. (That's where I am now - Mommie just put me down so I won't tear her paper.)

Much Later

Mommie decided this afternoon the....

Page 3

paint smell was too strong for us, so we went down to Aunt Edna's and spent the whole afternoon and had supper (Mommie cooked theirs down there and Aunt Edna ate with them). Daddy had opened all the windows while he was painting, and the house was so cold. My pajamas with the feet sure felt good when I went to bed.

(Mom's NOTE: Melinda is asleep now, but she told me what to write, so I'll finish now!)

I had the very best time at Aunt Edna's today. I stayed on the floor for the whole afternoon (her rug is so soft) and went from one end of the living room to the other. Gee - I got dirty and how nice it was! Mommie gave me a real good sponge bath before I ate supper, and changed my clothes. I felt kind of funny having a bath in someone else's house!

After I ate, Mommie sat me in my...

Page 4

bath tub on Aunt Edna's counter and I really found some interesting new things. I took all the tops off the canisters. Evidently I wasn't supposed to do that, because Mommie moved them away before I had a chance to taste all the funny things I found. She gave me some spoons and a pan to play with. Isn't it a wonderful noise when metal spoons bang on pans?

Life is so interesting now. I have such fun looking at all the things Mommie and Daddy have. I don't know why they keep saying "no-no" to me all the time. All I'm doing is looking and learning.

Did Mommie tell you that Sharon and her mother and daddy moved today? Mommie explained to me that their lease expired, so they had to move. I didn't care much, because Sharon wasn't much fun to play with. She's....

Page 5

just a baby! I have loads of fun with my best friend Patricia. She can't crawl or sit up yet, but she tells me she's just lazy! She just doesn't know what she's missing.

Grand-daddy, I hope the slide at Meadow Creek is starting to look better. You are working too hard! Please be careful and do try to get plenty of rest.

Gammie, Mommie has told me all about all the new clothes you're sending me. They're so excited to get the packages. The snow-suit, galoshes, and shoes came Thursday. I've already worn my new blue-checked panties and I just love them.  My tummy is so fat my other rubber pants are about to get too little. Mommie called me a butterball. I don't know what a butterball is. But I know what a ball is, 'cause I have two that I play with all the time now. They're rubber balls, not butterballs, though.

Page 6

Anyway, we all love my navy blue snowsuit and it'll fit me next year if I can just grow "up" instead of "wide." We like the shoes and galoshes, too. Daddy says he can't wait to see me in the galoshes!

Mommie and Daddy have told me we're going to take a long, long trip soon. I don't know what it's all about. I wish we were coming to see you. I would love to show you all my tricks - and I'd like to play with Smokey Joe (the dog).

And another trick she did often was take her shoes off as soon as Mom
had put them on! Here she is with the laces undone and also taken right out of the shoe.

And here are those sweet little shoes, which I have today.
Thanks for saving them Mom.

I wasn't going to tell Mommie, but she held my mouth open today (I wish I had some top toophies so I could have bitten her!) and discovered I'm going to cut a second toophy very soon. It makes me spit up a little, but it doesn't hurt. I try to be a good girl most of the time, but there's so much to see and do. Did you ever eat a magazine? Daddy's....

Page 7

"Posts" (magazines) taste so good. So does the newspaper.

I found out not long ago that I can make funny noises. I can scream and squeal real good, and I can whisper too. I'd rather scream and squeal! Mommie laughs at me when I get real quiet when the TV singing commercials come on. I know a lot of the different ones now, and listen and watch my favorite ones.

Dr. Baruch scratched me with a pin and made a great big sore come on my leg. It's getting well now. Mommie got a cellophane shield to put on it and maybe one of these days the scab will come off and I can take a bath again. I have missed my bath. I love the big tub Mommie bathes me in now.

Yep, when we're traveling we get a bath sometimes in the kitchen sink!
All good!

Well, Gammie and Grand-daddy, I will have to stop dictating to Mommie...

Page 8

now and go to bed. I will write again soon and tell you all about that new place we're going. I know I'll be the best-dressed baby in Holland, thanks to you two. Mommie and Daddy surely do appreciate all you've done for us - and I do too.

Nighty-night. Please pull Smokey's tail for me and give his ears a good tug.

Smokey Joe is being held by my Gammy on the right XO

Mommie and Daddy send their best love to you and here's a big hugs and kiss XOXO for both of you.

Oodles and oodles of love to my sweet, sweet Gammie and Grand-daddy - 

Melinda Page

Close-up of Melinda's "mark" XO

Ah, communication in those days. Mom desperately wanted to talk
with her parents before embarking on the long trip to the Netherlands.

You can see how strongly she felt.
Anything to get in touch and please reverse the charges!

A couple more treats for you that I came upon: Mom was a TREE HUGGER! Yeppers!

Look at that adorable girl just huggin' away!
We had more in common than I knew!

Mom, Dad, Gammy (left) and Grandaddy (right)
very early in their relationship. War years,
and isn't my Dad handsome in his uniform?!

You know what's going on here with Dad and Melinda?

Eskimo kisses! (Rubbing the noses across each other).
We did butterfly kisses too, which is eyelashes fluttering against the cheek XO

SO MUCH LOVE and happy times!
Let's celebrate those and hold them close!

So, after this long post, I'd like to encourage you to be creative and show appreciation for what your family members have done for you and with you. Have FUN with it - 'cause you never know how long that can last and how many hearts it may touch and inspire along the way.

Thanks for checking in. More to come, as always...big blessings and hugs coming your way from us.

Namaste,

~Jen