It's been awhile since I've posted and that's because I've been busy! For you! I will post the beautiful cover of my book below, PLUS the Table of Contents.
PLEASE let me know which chapter(s) you are most interested in reading as I can post one or two here to get you started. They're all special and I'm happy to share some prior to publication xo
You might be most interested in PART THREE - HEALING, as that's where a lot of good tools are. In the beginning of our story, you fall in love with Sweet Jess and maybe me, and if you're going through this journey of grief you will nod your head, thinking, Yep, I know that, I've felt that. In the next section you will feel the turning of the tide, where we begin to understand healing and how that comes about, plus some of the challenges we may face as we traverse the precipitous pathways of grief. In the third section there are wonderful tools and ceremonies and things you can do as you reach out into love and light and life, and the fourth section shares links and resources. My heart is with you XO
Please excuse the spacing as I'm pulling material over from my publisher's file and only have so much control over how it looks on here.
Coming Alive After Death
Coming Alive After Death
Copyright © 2021 by Jennifer Anne Berghage. All rights reserved.
No part of this book may be used or reproduced in any manner whatsoever without written permission, except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews. For more information, e-mail all inquiries to info@mindstirmedia.com.
DISCLAIMER
This book does not dispense medical advice or prescribe the use of any technique or exercise as a form of treatment for emotional or medical problems without the advice of a licensed physician. This book is intended for your emotional and spiritual quest for understanding, meaning, purpose, hope, love, and joy. In the event that you use any of the information in this book for yourself or with others, the author assumes no responsibility for your actions or results.
Published by Mindstir Media, LLC
45 Lafayette Rd | Suite 181| North Hampton, NH 03862 | USA 1.800.767.0531 |
www.mindstirmedia.com
Printed in the United States of America ISBN-13: XXX-X-XXXXXXX-X-X
Coming Alive After
Death
Recovery from Grief
JENNIFER ANNE BERGHAGE ABOUT THE AUTHOR
JENNIFER ANNE BERGHAGE spent sixteen years as a credentialed professional editor (Graduate School, USA) and instructional designer (UWISC, Madison) with The Pennsylvania State University, which prepared her well for authorship of her own works. Life, colorful life, prepared her to have something to write about. She never imagined it would be this. We write what we know. Jen knows intimately the journey of the death of a dearly, dearly, beloved and how to navigate it such that we can go through the fire and come out the other side, not unscathed, not without scars, but with life and love in our hearts. In Coming Alive After Death she shares resources, exercises, and strengths we can tap as we continue here after the transition of our beloveds.
v DEDICATION
I dedicate this book to all souls brave enough to love greatly. Namaste.
IF THIS BOOK HAS DRAWN YOUR INTEREST, imagine that I am standing next to you and holding your hand. You, or someone you love, are grieving the loss of a dearly, truly beloved. When this happened to me upon the death of my sweet, 26-year-old daughter, I found myself in a very dark place. Climbing out of this darkness and back into light, love, laughter, and pleasure felt not only wrong, but absolutely impossible.
I learned to walk through the fire and out the other side, because I am a beloved child of the Universe. True life and happiness belong to me for all the days and nights I am here on Earth. They also belong to me beyond this Earth life. And to you, Beloved, as well as to our beloveds.
It is possible to go through life, and many people do, experiencing the deaths of people and animals we care very much about without being brought to our knees. I had, by the age of 56, when my beautiful daughter died, experienced the death of about 40 gorgeous people that I cared very much about, and many animals too. I never, with any of these, felt like I did when my daughter died. So have no fear, if you
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Coming Alive After Death
have not experienced the level of grief that I describe in our story, you might never experience it, and you need not worry that this or that may happen to you. I write and share the depths of it so that if you do find yourself in this dark place you know that you can come out the other side. If you aren’t experiencing it, but you love someone who is, you may gain some insight in the healing and resource sections of this book as to how to help them through it.
The most important thing that I have found is that there IS life after death, both for me and for my sweet daughter. I hold her in my heart, as I am holding you, Beloved. Keep going. Breathe deeply. Love greatly without reservation. All is well.
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TABLE OF CONTENTS
PART ONE - Love and Death
Unintentional Thoughts—Shock and Trauma
Chapter 1 - Doorbell Day...............................................................3
Chapter 2 - Superstitions and Crossing the Line .............................8
Chapter 3 - Getting Through the Dark Times ..............................13
Chapter 4 - Flashbacks ................................................................. 17
Chapter 5 - Bringing Her Back.....................................................19
Chapter 6 - Loving Her ................................................................ 21
Chapter 7 - Undies and Laundry ..................................................24
Chapter 8 - Magical George.......................................................... 27
Chapter 9 - George and the Mystery Key......................................30
Chapter 10 - Wheelchair Etiquette ...............................................34
Chapter 11 - Mardi Gras Blessings................................................ 37
Chapter 12 - Wee Hour Interlude.................................................39
Chapter 13 - Negotiating Handicap Bathrooms............................42
Chapter 14 - Cruel Universe.........................................................44
Chapter 15 - Divine Connections.................................................46
Chapter 16 - Becoming Cinderella ............................................... 51
Chapter 17 - Young Love..............................................................57
Chapter 18 - Guidance.................................................................62
Chapter 19 - The Healing Time.................................................... 65
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Chapter 20 - Inheriting Freedom..................................................68
Chapter 21 - Giggles .................................................................... 71
Chapter 22 - The Forbidden ........................................................73
Chapter 23 - Stolen Comforts ......................................................76
Chapter 24 - Violation ................................................................82
Chapter 25 - The Fight................................................................. 87
Chapter 26 - Swansong Recovery..................................................95
Chapter 27 - Ceremony................................................................ 97
Chapter 28 - Packing Up..............................................................99
Chapter 29 - Black Jack..............................................................103
Chapter 30 - Special Delivery ..................................................... 107
Chapter 31 - Being Apart ...........................................................110
Chapter 32 - Bus Angels.............................................................115
Chapter 33 - New Year’s Eve.......................................................118
Chapter 34 - Mystery .................................................................120
Chapter 35 - Loving Through Anger ..........................................123
Chapter 36 - The Cremation ...................................................... 125
Chapter 37 - The Hike ............................................................... 128
Chapter 38 - Tsunami Week ....................................................... 135
Chapter 39 - Alice in Wonderland ..............................................140
Chapter 40 - History..................................................................143
Chapter 41 - Collecting Ashes .................................................... 146
Chapter 42 - Going Back Home ................................................ 151
Chapter 43 - Scattering Ashes.....................................................153
Chapter 44 - Winding Up ..........................................................160
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PART TWO - Coming Alive
Intentional Thoughts—Acceptance and Recognition
Chapter 45 - Hard Work ............................................................ 167
Chapter 46 - 450 Days of Crying ...............................................169
Chapter 47 - Sleeping, Waking...................................................173
Chapter 48 - Wine and Ativan....................................................176
Chapter 49 - Food......................................................................179
Chapter 50 - Metamorphosis ...................................................... 181
Chapter 51 - Blended Families....................................................185
Chapter 52 - He Said She Said ...................................................188
Chapter 53 - Full Stop. Holiday Time ........................................ 197
Chapter 54 - Acupuncture for Relief of Grief..............................202
Chapter 55 - The First Year ........................................................208
Chapter 56 - Unintentional Thinking vs. Intentional Thinking ...213
Chapter 57 - What is Love? ........................................................219
Chapter 58 - The Boy and His Gift ............................................ 221
Chapter 59 - The Big Separation ................................................ 231
Chapter 60 - What is Mourning?................................................234
Chapter 61 - Helplessness...........................................................238
Chapter 62 - Meltdowns.............................................................245
Chapter 63 - Working or Not, Priorities ..................................... 253
Chapter 64 - Blame, Judgment, Difficult Relationships ..............259
Chapter 65 - Forgiveness ............................................................264
Chapter 66 - Emotions...............................................................266
Chapter 67 - Suicidal Ideation....................................................273
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Chapter 68 - Spiritual Contracts.................................................279
Chapter 69 - Empowerment Through Meditation ...................... 296
Chapter 70 - The Purpose of Life ...............................................303
Chapter 71 - What is Consciousness? .........................................306
Chapter 72 - The Purpose of Death............................................308
Chapter 73 - The Purpose of Religion.........................................312
Chapter 74 - Our Celestial Gifts.................................................316
Chapter 75 - WOO—What Otherworlds Offer .........................334
Chapter 76 - Signs—Ask and We Shall Receive .......................... 345
Chapter 77 - Akasha...................................................................350
Chapter 78 - Being (Be-In) Ourselves ......................................... 357
Chapter 79 - Freedom ................................................................359
Chapter 80 - The Question of Our Own Death..........................362
PART THREE - Healing
Counting All Blessings—Gratitude and Peace
Chapter 81 - What Not to Do, What to Do ............................... 377
Chapter 82 - Building New Traditions........................................386
Brush Your Hair Therapy ............. 387
Two Pairs of Socks Therapy .......... 387
Velvet Pillow Therapy................... 388
Teddy Bear Therapy ..................... 389
Paint Your Nails Therapy.............. 390
Candles and Tealights...................390
Fragrance Therapy........................391
Plant Therapy...............................392
Music Therapy ............................. 396
YouTube Therapy ......................... 398
Pinterest Visual Therapy............... 399
Animal Therapy ........................... 399
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Professional Therapy .................... 402
Grief Groups ................................ 404
Life Coaches.................................407
Acupuncture ................................ 408
Reiki ............................................ 408
Yoga ............................................. 409
Massage ........................................ 410
Tarot Cards and Oracle Cards ...... 411
Meditation ................................... 412
Fireside Release and Embrace Ceremony......................421
Art ............................................... 422
Learning Something New.............427
Looking for the Good .................. 429
Cultivating Brand New Friendships .........................430
Nature and Gardening..................433
Sleeping........................................ 436
Dreaming ..................................... 437
Honoring ..................................... 445
Relaxation - Grief Breaks, Mindfulness ................................. 44
Ritual, Ceremony, and Tradition .. 446
Being Silly....................................447
Countering Pain with Pleasure ..... 448
Laughter....................................... 451
Picnics .......................................... 453
Cooking—Food that Comforts .... 45
Water: Baths, Lakes, Rivers, Ocean, Pools, Waterfalls, Hot Springs ...... 454
Volunteer Work............................456
Children and/or Elders.................456
Gold Star—Connection with Our Beloved.........................457
Funeral Letter...............................458
Chapter 83 - Why build new traditions? Spiritual Agreements....460
Chapter 84 - The Dragon...........................................................462
Chapter 85 - The Charts ............................................................464
Chapter 86 - What to Trust .......................................................468
Chapter 87 - Past Life Regression ...............................................469
Chapter 88 - Letters to Your Future Selves..................................480
Chapter 89 - Arms Wide Open ..................................................483
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PART FOUR - Resources
Favorite People ...........................................................................489
Favorite Publications ..................................................................493
Favorite WOO Tools ..................................................................496
Favorite Internet Resources.........................................................499
Favorite Music Artists.................................................................502
Happy Things To Do..................................................................503
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS ......................................................... 505
All the loves coming your way! Contact me at comingaliveafterdeath@gmail.com if you'd like to talk privately by email.
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