Knife Stabs and Lemonade at Halloween

My favorite witch

It was late. I'd worked on my beautiful cat cabochon necklace for hours, and then decided sort of spontaneously to get into the holiday spirit by getting out my Halloween decorations. I don't subscribe to the "let's make every holiday Christmas and decorate the hell out of everything attitude," but I do like a couple of things around to acknowledge "All Saint's Day," which has many different types of celebration and commemoration. It is the day we acknowledge the world of Spirit.

I love witches, their history, their mystery, and the good work that they do. My husband and I have favorite Halloween movies and shows that we watch, including The Good Witch, Hocus Pocus, Witches of Eastwick, Fairy Tale: A True Story, The Legend of Sleepy Hollow, and others. It's just what we do.

So I went down into our basement to bring my witches upstairs and my little purple furry bat and my paper pumpkin dangle pull-string doll that I like to hang on the front door, but I forgot that we had a basement flood and everything was moved in a frenzy to get things out of the water several weeks ago.

I stood in the basement next to the Christmas ornament tubs on the shelves, and put my finger to my lips, wondering where my pink tupperware tub of witches was. It used to be right on the floor next to the Christmas ornaments.

I thought maybe I'd forgotten, and they weren't in a pink tub. And I opened the lid of a big plastic tub which held my daughter's cheerleading pompoms and outfits and I spun around, reeling - oh! Oh! That was not my witches.

So I realized they might be in the next basement room and walked through the semi-darkness into the area where we had put all the tubs full of my daughter's sacred things. They had been stacked against the wall in the driest spot, safe from floods, and I discovered they were piled atop with all kinds of other things, one of which flipped my heart right over.

It was something her birth father "created" in 2001 when he'd taken her for a major haircut. It was a stupid box picture frame with her photo in it and a long, long ponytail of her beautiful hair. Jess had said when he gave it to her that she thought it was kind of creepy. And when she sorted out her stuff in the basement one year while visiting, she had put it in a bag for the trash pile. He'd installed a brass plaque with the date, along with her ponytail and I picked it up and flipped it upside down and it made a very satisfying thump. But my heart thumped along with it. What the hell do you do with something like this when your beautiful daughter has passed? It is not right to put it into the trash. And it would kill me to hang it up somewhere, "Oh I have my daughter's hair but I don't have her!" I couldn't do that.

So in the wee hours of the night I brought it upstairs and took it apart. I didn't care about the stupid brass plaques, I kept the beautiful photo, and I took the ponytail out. Oh so beautiful and oh such sparkly suncatching hair so soft. I took off the damn velcro around the ponytail and I made a new ponytail with my soft little tiny rubber bands and I wove two love braids, a big one, and a little one.

Beautiful sparkles, which I'm sure she's still sparkling

I tried hard not to curse my ex-husband for making me do this. I tried to make it a beautiful experience, yet more caretaking of what my daughter no longer needs. Owie. Love braids.

I had some volunteer snapdragons that had grown by the doorway of my studio and I picked some.

Volunteer sunshine happiness

Sonofabitch. So I wrapped her beautiful ponytail in soft paper towels and with my collection of beautiful snapdragons I went, as dawn was rising, into the backyard and walked to our peach tree where we had sat as the sun set in the evenings, on the grass, drinking wine and talking during her last visit home.

The walk was supported by my little yard fauna and fellows.

My beautiful fern and hosta friends encouraged me to keep going.

My buddy

My little gnome gave me encouragement to keep going.

I kneeled on the ground and felt my knees get wet with dew. I inhaled the beautiful fragrance of the earth, oh so sweet, and dug a hole. And put flowers in. And put her beautiful hair in. And covered it up. And put flowers on top.

Flowers guarding

And I said a prayer.

And I got up with the dawn rising and the mists all around me and I was comforted by beautiful flowers on the way back.

Sweet flowers on the way back

Sweet garden friends on the way back

And I said to myself, "It's okay. It's okay."

Life in all its stages

And it is. Life blossoms, and it makes seeds, and seeds grow to blossom again.

Young witch

Old witch

Flying witch

Peace in the night

So we have put yet some more painful things to rest and tried to create ceremony and beauty around that. Yes I kept a tiny lock of her beautiful sparkly hair and put it in my treasure box. 

And I slept a lot.

And now we turn our attention to other stories of the season - Leprechauns, Fairies, and Dreams.

Movietime

Sweet relief

Thank goodness for all who work in the realms of happiness. Even amidst our sorrows. When we have lemons, we make lemonade.

We can do hard things.

Namaste,
Jen

Letters from Jess - As Above, So Below

Doodle play

Going within

I've been keeping a journal with my daughter who passed into her celestial home January 9th, of 2015. I counted the number of letters I've written since then (16 in 18 months just from me, 6 just from Jess in that timeframe, and 5 "dialogs" that go back and forth between us). I counted to check and make sure I was being healthy about this, not obsessed, not "waiting," but just communicating comfortably. I figure a letter per month is pretty good, though some months I didn't feel the urge to write at all and other months I wrote more depending on circumstances and whether emotions needed attention.

I include our little doodles because dear Desiree taught me that when I'm in the mood to write or to hear from Jess it is good to calm myself by drawing spirals, starting from the outside in. So I do. Sometimes Jess adds her little doodles too xo.

Her latest letter is very interesting, because it shows some maturity in her ability to communicate as well as her activities. It is insightful, and so I share it with love and wonderment for the vastness that is our celestial home. 

It is my understanding that our experience of "heaven" is very individualistic, though research will show some similarities. We don't lose our "personality," or our "individuality," and our experiences are as unlimited as our imaginations. Imagination is something purely divine. We have access to it here on beautiful Earth. And of course, if we were given a gift from heaven how could it be otherwise than something without limitation, something vast and huge with unlimited potential in unlimited universes and levels of vibrational life? Heaven doesn't just give us gifts of matter, though we can play with them. "Matter" is just a drop in the bucket of playtoys from heaven. It morphs. It breathes. It lives.

So I will put the photographs of her letter up and add my comments below. As I've said before, when she writes, there is usually what I call a "zinger," something I wouldn't ordinarily think about, something insightful that encourages me to consider its application in our real world. She was very helpful with the concept of "effect" in her latest letter.

About celestial teachers

The zinger for me on these pages is first, that she has several teachers, and the subjects they cover include learning, growing, having fun, reflection - a bit more about that in a minute. I love that she explains how they come by their positions - "they reach their positions through their hearts and their actions - so they want to be doing what they're doing and they like it. They smile and they laugh and they are very patient." 

So there doesn't seem to be a system of election of any form, rather a soul gets to work "at purpose" according to their own loves and interests, following their hearts so to speak. Cool beans. I like that. I'll go there!

Then when she says "I just think of what I want to do and start doing it. And I can without limitations." My first thought is "Oh no, if I were able to master something very quickly I'd surely be bored, and then what? Bored for eternity?" BUT...

A lovely new zinger to contemplate : )

Then she gives me a new zinger to contemplate. She says that what makes learning interesting (and I have a vision in my head of her playing the harmonica, which she loved to do here) is "watching the effect it has on everything else that it affects. That's something we can't see the 'whole' of when we're in Earth Life form. We only get glimpses there and sometimes they are limited to what others want us to know/see or not know/see. Here we can have awareness of everything."

So when I think of "as above, so below" I think of us in our clunky human bodies cranking out our stuff and the incredible breadth of blindness in ourselves of the effect of anything we do or say on other people, other entities, other systems, etc. And I imagine for a few minutes what it would be like to have an awareness so large and without judgment or ownership that we could "see" the ripples and feel ripples coming back to us. Another pretty vast gift of heaven. Thank goodness it's not as small as we've been taught. I think I might not be bored at all!

I think of our technologies and how we're blindly trying to bring down this ability to gauge the effects of our creations and actions using back end analytics, especially in the educational fields (but this also applies to every single action, word, thought, etc.), and I see clearly how clunky it really is, but I also see that we are making an effort to measure, in Earth terms, with Earth limitations, our effects and then to take that information and enhance our creations and efforts to improve them so that effects are better. (And that's a huge thought with many factors, such as the incentives of those who are creating and for what purpose, unfortunately usually financial gain.)

I love that in these pages she tells me that my plants love music (I play lots of it for them frequently) and they love when I imagine them growing to their full potential. They are my beloved friends.

I love that she advises me to work more with visualizing happy images in my mind. She says it helps my vibration to attract other happy imaginers and thinkers. Well I love that don't I? Let's all do a little more of it. I wonder how many of us let the media dictate our thoughts and imaginings. How many of us sit on the porch for a few minutes each day and fill our minds with happy imaginings - memories, dreams. I agree it is "good to play with," as she says.

Nourishment

I'm fascinated with what she says about nourishment. "It's a form of love. It's something we absorb - it's everywhere, and we choose what to engage with to feel nourished." Well that's just beautiful. How do we fit that into our day? 

Here's where the maturity is starting to show in her growth - it was always there, but she's exploring it and sharing it more now - when she says "we can get nourishment in several different ways, for several different purposes - cleansing - all our 'layers,' creating, relaxing, socializing, resting, exploring, learning, everything imaginable. Nourishment is abundant and free for the choosing. There is no ownership here," (Big one.) "only availability. Everything is freeflowing. Priceless. So there is no fear of scarcity." 

We think nourishment is "food," and we scarf down whatever we pick up in the stores that "isn't" food, or we follow an organic or vegan regime and we forget to remember that nourishment is so many things besides what we know as "food." We are deeply nourished by experiences of the right kind, more than we know. They are powerful. And very personal. Each person knows deep down inside what experiences, things, places, people will give them nourishment. What if we seek that consciously? Do we know to do that? I for one, am giving more time to activities that nourish me, knowing that I'm being fed on levels I was previously unaware of. I don't need anyone's permission. Isn't that lovely?

I am interested in her illustration of the active process of manifestation: thought => action => promotion/marketing => distribution + supplies/time => results. She says the formula works on Earth: desire/love/pursuit/learning/action => results, but it is "affected by Earthlings themselves." I love that she says there is a lot of room for all kinds of creation on Earth. I totally understand when she says it makes a difference to be in a "peaceable community."

Jess doodles

Jess doodles

Jess doodles

Jess doodles

LOVE

Thank you my sweet love for sharing your beautiful insights. May we find peace in our hearts to see the glimpses of your heaven that you share with us, and may we find inspiration in your beautiful words. Thank you for coming to us! I love you forever and a day.

Namaste,
Jen

Crow Cabochon Necklace is done

The beautiful Crow

Whenever I was camping with my children in our beloved California territories under the ancient spreading branches of the oak trees, the first sound we would hear as the sun rose was the call of the crows. Their voices echoed throughout the forest. One at a time they would announce the rising of the sun to each other and all the forest creatures, big and small. A new day has come! And the golden light would dapple through the tiny leaves of the trees, making them sparkle. And sometimes the mists would rise. And we would wake, start a fire, and make the best ever coffee you've ever dreamed of, and hot chocolate for the children. And scrambled eggs and sausage over an open fire, knowing that our day would be "off the clock" and we could follow the forest pathways to our hearts' content, delighting in the nourishment only beautiful Nature offers.

Crow cabochon necklace is becoming.....

So I wanted to celebrate my love of Crow, and I made this beautiful cabochon by attaching the image to the glass, then spent time choosing the colors that Crow might enjoy. They like sparkly things, so I chose some bright whites to complement the clouds in the image as well as what Crow might be drawn to pick up should she come upon it. Her celestial environment also included beautiful shades of purples and blues, so I chose some seed beads to complement these colors. And of course a bit of black for the inky iridescence of her feathers.

Fancy dancer

I sewed and sewed and sewed and Crow danced with me, helping me choose the patterns of her fringe strands, which include beautiful iridescent accent beads reminiscent of the sunrises and sunsets she sings to, and tips reminiscent of the colors sparkling from her feathers in just certain light. Purples, blacks, soft mauves, creamy opalescent whites. She is not shy.

Thick, glorious colorful, dancing fringe!

There she is.

Crow cabochon necklace, mmmm.

Length of Necklace Strap - 23 inches

Width of Crow Cab - 2 inches

Length of Crow Cab with Fringe - 5 and 3/4 inches

Hangs mid-chest. Comes in a velveteen pouch for softkeeping.

She's available in Dreamkeeper Creations on Etsy til she finds her forever home.

Namaste,
Jen

Fairy Ring Painting in the works!

Almost done

So I've been playing with my paints after taking the Jan Schmuckal course. I love her style, and she makes it look easy, but she's had lots of practice. This is my first one. It will be done in a few days, with final touches and refinement.

Here's how it started out.

First stain attempt

The premise of this "tonalist" style of painting is that you stain the canvas with a rich cherry-wood or mahogany colored stain made up of a selection of colors mixed with Liquin. Then you wipe out the light areas.

Same canvas, same pic, more wiping.

My picture is metamorphosing each time I work on it and I have no idea what I'm doing - just learning.

Final Stain updated

With a few changes to the background hill, I decided it was time to let it dry overnight and play with color the next day.

First attempt at color blocking

So here's what it looked like after I got half the color blocked in. I knew I still had a long way to go.

Still have no idea what I'm doing but it's fun!

And here I've loosely blocked in leaf masses, ground masses, sky masses, etc.

Starting to pull in clouds.

My photo reference didn't have any clouds that day, it was just a clump of trees, and I decided to go ahead and start using my imagination, so I started playing with sun and clouds.

Photo reference in color

Photo reference black and white

Dark, but starting to come together.

I played and played and got most of the leaf masses accounted for and some of the imaginary sun and clouds. Played with the fields and bushes a bit, and the foreground.

Here's where we are now.

Next steps are to pull out a bit more color in the clouds, a bit more around the base of the tree, and the fairy circle happening in the middle of the field at twilight between the tree and the hill. 

My style is not realistic, obviously, I am staying true to the world of my fairies, but I am also working towards the glow - the beautiful light that happens as the sun sets and the fairies begin to dance. Will post the finished picture and can't wait to start another. With this first one I've learned so much!

All comments most welcome! Does it speak to you in any way?

Namaste,

Jen

Shakespeare's Midsummer Night's Fairy Cabochon Necklace is done!

Beautiful colors of the Male Fairy Cabochon

I think I'm getting even better at making these beautiful cabochon necklaces.

This male fairy jumped into my hands the other day and he called for purple! and green! and dark steely blue! I listened.

Took me about half an hour to choose the beads to go around him and I felt so delighted to see them spread across the drafting table in my studio that overlooks the backyard, the birds, and the trees. My favorite spot in which to create that lets in soft breezes and sunshine.

Detail of the image Warwick Goble painted.

This cabochon that I made is a detail of an image Warwick Goble painted for William Shakespeare's Midsummer Night's Dream - published in The Fairy Book in 1920. I created the borders using peyote stitch, which we love! One difference between my work and the work of many other beaders is that I don't rely on just glue to hold my cabs - they're sewn in and will stay put with no surprises.

Top q u a l i t y xo

The complete image (nearly).

And what's better for a woman than dreaming outside on a warm midsummer's eve, softly cradled by Earth Mother herself?

Here's a photo of the necklace all done, yay.

And this photo shows a bit of its personality. 

Male fairy asked for Earth elements in the fringe of this necklace, so we chose iridescent purply blue flower tips and soft iridescent leaves and gorgeous Czech teardrops, like dewdrops, for the fringe tips. 

It's strung on good, strong Fireline, which gives the fringe a bit of wiggle. I love it. 

Forest green for the back.

The back is finished in my favorite color, dark forest green Ultrasuede.

Necklace strap - 22 and 1/2 inches

Cabochon with fringe - 5 and 1/4 inches at longest point

Cabochon alone - 1 and 7/8 inches across (with border)

Hangs mid-chest.

Comes in a velveteen pouch for softkeeping.

Can be worn with everything, dresses, tanks, blue jeans, etc. - but wait til it's somewhat "seasoned" to wear with white or very pale colors as the dark green may rub off with moisture while it's new.

Good work, time well spent : ))

Thank you for visiting Dreamkeeper Creations! This necklace will be up in my Etsy shop for awhile, and in Green Drake Gallery for awhile after that til it finds its forever home.

Namaste,

Jen