I Don't Know How to Gossip!

I might like it....

The kids gave my husband a lovely book for us to read and digest and discuss called Sapiens: A Brief History of Humankind, by Yuval Noah Harari. It's interesting.

The author writes about many things, one of which is gossiping. His contention is that it is foundational to culture and society and the hub around which all organizations, groups, and institutions revolve, and even thrive.

Welp, I didn't get that memo. Does everyone know how to gossip? Do you know how? Do you do that? Is it a good thing? I've heard so much about the subject, and been the subject "of" it a million times in my life, having moved all over the world about every two years, and sometimes more often than that, so I was always "the new kid on the block." Great fodder for gossip since I was always "different."

The new kid on the block, if she's smart, doesn't talk much, she listens. Well it took me a long time to get smart, so I opened my mouth and spit out what I had been taught: "Small minds discuss people, average minds discuss events, and great minds discuss ideas," attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt. She was quite something if you know anything about her hidden history. And if you knew her history you'd not be able to resist gossiping about her.

Throughout all my working years, my career years, I was taught by my father (early on) to be task oriented. Get the job done. Do an excellent job. Focus. Learn. Teach. Work hard. Don't waste your time. Don't waste anyone else's time.

I'd lived in big cities for much of my life, then moved to a small town when I was in my late 30s. Hm. That was quite different, and peeps got along by talking about other peeps a LOT. I just listened. I think I judged them too, my bad. Leaning into early admonishment about ideas vs. people.

What Harari proposes is interesting. And I would agree that this IS what happens. And now I understand why I wasn't the sunshine kid on the block. Peeps didn't know what to make of me because I didn't know how to join in the gossip.

And I often made the mistake of sticking up for the underdog they were gossiping about, oops. But I still do that every time. If it's nice talk I'm in. If it's throwing people under the bus, welp, that's been done to me so many times you'd think I'd be flat as a pancake, but pasta, bread, cheese, and good wine help me to avoid that. Not flat. But still stickin' up for the underdog.

Because through all the adventures of my life I've learned not to judge, and that every single person has the right to choose to be who and what they are at any given moment. It's not my business to stick my nose in.

I haven't yet decided if this is a good decision on my part. To stick my neck out, to stand with the underdogs, to admit that sometimes I'm the underdog, very loyal, friendly, love those pats and belly rubs, but not a biter, no not for me. My teeth were put there to chomp meat and grind grains and mush up veggies and fruits for nourishment.

And the best nourishment of all, I have found, is LOVE.

Can there be love in gossip? 

Maybe.

It's not a club I miss. I prefer celebration of others. All the happies. Me and my rose-colored glasses.

Your reputation is safe with me XO!

That's all.

Namaste