Thursday, December 1, 2016

3 Empowering Tips from Heaven

New Journal - Letters from Jess in Heaven
When we connect, Jess is wise in her very own snappy, energetic, sometimes quiet, gentle way. Spirit stuff is simple - not convoluted, not complex, not manipulative, just beautifully clear, and she's able to articulate it so that little lightbulbs go on in my mind and heart, and a bit of time spent with her turns my feelings from sadness to joy.

This particular letter I received post-Thanksgiving, which was a somewhat painful holiday, as is expected so soon after her transition, and perhaps you can relate if you've recently or even not so recently "lost" a loved one. To get to the joy, read on....

On the night I received this letter from Jess I walked through my kitchen several times, where my sweet husband had made dinner much earlier, on my way to let the pups out for a few minutes, to go to the bathroom, to replenish my wine or water, and each time I waved my hands at the dishes feeling overwhelmed. Needless to say, they did not magically sparkle up and put themselves away. I felt guilty for not being the me that I used to be, the always productive me with the relatively constant happiness bubble. I felt guilty for not being that me that my husband deserves all the time, not just in spurts.

And I went into the studio where I'd spent a lot of time with Jess and sat, trying to make myself sleepy, nothing on the telly, thoughts not too positive after the election, and took a deep breath and opened our journal and began to write. Here, she shares her heaven and some really beautiful tips on our lives here and how to empower ourselves. Thank you sweet Jess, in your wisdom and humor and wholeness, for beaming down clarity and beauty and joy and so much love.  xo

The images will enlarge when you click on them if you want to read the whole letter. I don't correct her spelling, and sometimes she adds little doodles and hearts and things, it's adorable. The letter in its wholeness is much more beautiful than just reading my comments, and it's really really cute, very Jess xo

Me being brave, initiating contact....
Whenever I had phone calls with my kids, I tried never to let them know how very much I missed them cause I wanted them to spread their wings and not feel "held back" by a "needy" mother. So I didn't actually say the words "I miss you." Also I never said the word "Goodbye." It was always, "I'll talk to you soon." Just how my heart works....

So in this letter to Jess I definitely did say "If this were a phone call and I were honest, I would tell you I miss you." Journaling is a safe place to tell the truth without feeling guilty.

Her beautiful response....
I didn't think she'd be able to reach me because though I was fairly even-keel, I was feeling distressed at not being able to "give" to her, to "love" her in this holiday season like I had for so many years in our past.

So first of all, I'm so happy to hear from her, and second, she had a LOT to say. Yes, as the letter mentions, sometimes I feel tingles across my head, and a part of me expands and I know it's her, in the evening or at night just being near and loving me. xoxo

My lecture from Jess xo

So the first thing I received in this letter I "tongue-in-cheek" call her "lecture." She is firmly setting me back into myself. We used to tease each other, when she was here alive with me, that we'd had past lives where she was the mom and I was the kid, and now she's stepped into the role of guidance. Her guidance is wise.

Tip number 1 from Jess: For all grieving Lovies, it's important not to blame every negative or painful emotion on the "one lost" or those events. I think she's saying that sometimes when we get hit sideways by a seemingly catastrophic event we can feel somewhat entangled in it. She's reminding me to simplify. As we go through our Earthly journeys, we experience emotion, and it teaches us if we listen to it. She's reminding me that my own teachings have not stopped. She's reminding me to listen to myself. And she's reminding me to lighten up. It's amazing how much my mood can be elevated by just remembering that she wants me to lighten up. It's like a little permission slip - you can be happy, you can have pleasure, you can feel joy.

Side note - She's referring to the book I recently read by James Van Praagh called Reaching To Heaven, where I felt in my heart I disagreed with some of the things he was saying. One was that we take addictions with us when we die. Bullshit. That just doesn't make sense to me at all and I've not encountered it in any of my other reading ventures. The physical body is very different from our light bodies, and I just can't buy into the idea that the "physical need for any substance" carries over. So we disagree somewhat. I have found that each individual's experience of the afterlife differs from others in many ways, so I'll give Van Praagh that much margin for writing what he wrote, though I'm pretty sure that once we know we're out of the physical body we begin to learn the properties of the "new" light body (spirit, soul, whatever you prefer to call it), and that it isn't affected by physical addiction. Freedom is definitely a huge factor in the celestial worlds.

Back to wisdom from heaven...

We are compelled to be ourselves, are we doing that, are we listening to our hearts?
I love that Jess is talking about the compulsion to "be herself." What good does it do us to live our lives according to the dictates of others?

When she says "who are you gonna listen to," it amuses me because she has a very firm, sure attitude about her sometimes and it's just so "Jess." It was the part of her that was very very organized and good at details and business and money management while she was here. Also the part that enjoyed (and still enjoys) a bit of showmanship. I LOVE that sweet voice. Well, then she goes into some more shared wisdom, which lightens my heart.

Tip number 2 from Jess: "Life is not something you save, or "bottle up." It's something that you move through." Wow I love that. It seems a no-brainer, but I've never actually been able to articulate it. I think our society shows that many of us aren't too comfortable with it, or maybe we're unaware of it. We like to pin things down, collect them, preserve them, leave our markers. The closest I've come to hearing about the flow she describes is in the saying "The only constant in life is change," and that often has a negative connotation. Tip number 2 isn't talking about errands, taxi-parenting, cleaning house, and those kinds of physical movement - it's talking about the flow of life. Life is something you move through.

Then, the inspiration for a new painting is born when Jess talks about the reminders from God or the Universe or Our Creative Source or Nature, (whatever you prefer to call it) when she describes the flow that happens when we learn to move through life.

She says: "All the earth has that example of flow to remind our hearts to let go - it has the wind, the tides, and the breath of all living things. That is one of Nature's great lessons but nobody listens to the wind anymore, and we don't hear the message of the tides, and we breathe shallowly or even sometimes hold our breath."

"That's why meditation is good for you Momma. It helps you connect with the eternal flow, and let go a little bit."

The painting will be a depiction of the wind over the sea and a person meditating on the beach. This will remind me of the flow, and to move through life, not holding on too tight.

Number 3 Wise Tip from Heaven
Tip number 3 from Jess: "Call everything your own, Mama, what you eat, what you drink, what you breathe, what you say, what you do, what you think. You are a child of the Universe, and unique like a snowflake. There is little value in denying that or tamping it down. Your passions are your passions. Let them guide you. As if you were a child - knowing no fear or control of others."


My response within our letter: "I hear you telling me to live with all of myself."

Her response: "Yep. You got it!"

Closure of this letter
Yep. She can pour life back into me. So after our letter I went into the kitchen and quietly cleaned it up. Dishes done with loving heart, counters wiped. Recyclables out. Kitty in and back door locked. I padded to bed in my soft slippers, kicked them off, climbed in, and slept the sleep of babes.

And my sweet husband woke to a clean kitchen and a wife who can cope, not only that, but "be in the moment" with joy in her heart. Warm water, soft bubbles cleaning dishes that held the food that nourishes our bodies, appreciation for all that he enjoys creating, peaceful night.

Thank you Jess, my loving daughter and very wise big spirit.

In the closure of our letter I love where she talks about babyfood. Really? Can't wait to see where we go from here...I'll share!

AND just after I finished posting the first draft of this blog post my music turned on on my other computer all by itself and this is what played (my favorite song of all time, whenever I hear it I have to stop and be enraptured) - which I used to watch with my kids during the holidays: The Snow Man. And after that, something completely so Jess - Ella Fitzgerald - I love when Jess sends me songs!

Happy journaling and happy holidays xo


P.S. Interesting note - the first draft was posted at 5:05, and numbers and their spiritual properties interest me, so I looked it up - it aligns so nicely with the content of the post : )

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