The In-Between Time

Sweet Doves, the birds of Love

So I've been sitting vigil for some of my Lovies who have transitioned to our Celestial home over the past few weeks and days. Rob's Dad is in our Celestial home now. My sweet friend and colleague Amy is in our Celestial home now. My sister's son's wife's mother is in our Celestial home now. My husband's father's sister's son is in our Celestial home now. Ah, so many exits. We celebrate their beautiful lives with love.

Sweet Incense

I light incense on the porch outside and a candle or two in my studio for them. My candles are like winks or nods that I know they can see and feel. I fill up the birdfeeders outside and somehow feel a connection and communication through the sky-fliers. They come in flocks, or couples - the cardinals and blue jays who've been procreating in our backyard for some 12 years now. The hawk who sits in the tree across the street that I can see outside the windows of my studio. The crows who caw in the evenings and the doves who coo in the mornings.

Lovely Cardinals, Spirit's Herald

I feel my daughter close, who has been living in our Celestial home for going on four years now. She strokes my hair and makes my head tingle sometimes in the quiet of the night when I'm doing artwork or beadwork or writing. When she was here in life and she was little, she would stand at my elbow while I was working, and I would explain to her what I was creating. It is like that when she strokes my hair.

She also played again with the TV tonight to let me know she was here, or maybe it was sweet Amy checking in. I had had the TV on for the evening, and was at my desk winding up a few details on the editing project I'm working on. When I finished, I turned to go over and sit on the little leather couch in my studio, and I realized the TV had half turned itself off. "Hello," I said. I wasn't sure if it was Jess or Amy visiting but I knew it was Spirit cause one of the first things they learn to do because they are full-on vibration is to play with other full-on vibration here, and electricity is that.

I blew a kiss and air-talked with whatever Spirit was visiting, asking for my TV operations to be restored since it is my comfort. I worked with the remote control pushing various buttons - the "all power" button vs. the "on/off" button. It took its time responding, but respond it did after about five minutes. "Thank you," I said.

"I bet you're loving it," I said in case it was Amy. "You're still you, but bigger, and you have no pain!" I said. "And you can slip in and beam your love to your family!" I said. "I know, I know," I said. From the bottom of my heart, I know.

We all have our angels xo

They have zero judgment and they beam love and encouragement to us all the time. They feel so very relieved of the weight and machinations of the Earthly world. It's meant to be a good, sweet world, but at the moment it's in the control of some really unawakened, dare I call them, people. I want to call them barbaric animals, but no, I will not say it out loud.

I thought of what my friends who had lost children to death said to me, "It's a long road, but you'll make it," as I remembered the beautiful, heartfelt post Amy's daughter posted - my Mom was a strong woman and she raised me to be that way too. I will carry on and live my life to the fullest, because that's what she taught me, gave me. I'm paraphrasing here.

Tree of Life 

And I thought, I said the same things when Jess made her transition - I felt strong in those first days. But it is a long road with lots of ups and downs. And I wanted to tell Amy's family - cry when you need to right out loud. Those tears are healing for your body and mind and soul. And laugh. Laugh whenever you have the opportunity and it sneaks up on you, most likely brought on first by a loving, sweet animal, or perhaps another family member or friend. See the beauty in the passing of each moment and grab what sunshine there is. Your heart may feel heavy sometimes. Put on two pairs of fluffy socks and wrap up in a soft bathrobe and curl up under a blanket when you need to, with that sweet animal or a fresh-from-heaven baby human. Hug a lot. Sleep with a soft, fluffy teddy bear to shield your wounded chest from the pain. Pull out hankies when you need them and walk tall in the world in-between these times, doing what it is you care most about.

The sun will come out. It will come out now, but not in the brilliance that it will come out later. Ride the waves of emotion and know that they will pass. Be ever so grateful that you had someone to love so much - some people do not have that in their lives. Know that your mother, daughter, wife, sister, aunt, is not missing, like some others who never find closure to a life so well-lived. Know that she did not pass through violence, but surrounded by the tender, loving care of her family. Blessings. So many blessings. Hold them dear. I think her beautiful spirit orchestrated this. It was her journey and what a beautiful journey it has been.

The sun will come out....

Know that you will be reunited. Yes, go on and live your life to the fullest, not out of fear, but out of love. Love for the life she gave you, love for the love she poured into everyone and everything she touched. She was an inspirational spirit. So very special.

This is the in-between time. For her in her Celestial world, she is now like the facets of a diamond - all of her lives, all of her whole Self, even bigger than she was when she was here with us. She will come to you when invited with a peaceful heart. She is living, more vibrant than we can even imagine. Loving, with a love so deep and profound that we can only imagine it. Feel her all around you, by invitation. And live. Love. No reservations.

Welcome her in dreams, she will come to you. She knew the mysteries of Spirit - we had conversations about it. She is clean and good and whole and happy and beaming her love to you all the time. Yes she is.

The gifts of Spirit are not so mysterious or intangible as we have been taught. Trust the love. Trust the process. Honor her full journey which is now complete, as we must with all those who pass before us. One day it will be our turn and how do we want to orchestrate that? How do we want our beloveds to feel after we're finished here on the beautiful Earth plane?

I want my Lovies to feel happy to have known me. Happy to have benefitted in some way from what I had to offer. Appreciative. But definitely not sad upon my passing. I would want them to celebrate that with all of themselves because that's what I will be doing. A job well-done. A journey completed. A well-earned rest and more adventures to look forward to and plan. Love connected always. I think it is good to treat the deaths of our Lovies as we would want our Lovies to feel when we pass. Because we will, we will. Thank goodness.

Namaste,
Jen